


(now press repeat)

by StormVandal



Category: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind AU, M/M, dubcon pete/brendon (non-sexual), multiple side pairings - Freeform, unreality warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-17
Updated: 2015-03-27
Packaged: 2018-02-21 06:25:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 15,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2458172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StormVandal/pseuds/StormVandal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>"I'm erasing you!" he screams after him. "Do you hear me, Pete?! I'm erasing you! By morning you'll be gone!"</i><br/>Mikey hires a company to erase his memories of his relationship with Pete after Pete does the same to him.</p>
<p>(Most of this fic takes place inside of Mikey's head, so warning for slight unreality in some places.)</p>
<p>**PLEASE NOTE: I no longer consider myself a Fall Out Boy fan, and actively dislike Pete Wentz. I'm leaving this story up for now, but there's a good chance it'll be either deleted or orphaned in the future. If you enjoy this story and would like to reread it, it would probably be wise for you to find and bookmark it on my livejournal (stormvandal.livejournal.com).**</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Ostinato

**Author's Note:**

  * For [morbid_beauty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/morbid_beauty/gifts).



> Welcome to the longest bandom fic I've ever written.  
> I started writing this for my good friend Ephy (morbid_beauty) AGES ago; I finished it in October of last year. Part of the reason that it took so long to write was because I tend to be meticulous; much of the dialogue is very similar to the movie, and so took ages to write because I kept having to watch scenes over and over, and there are several Sweet Little Dudes "easter eggs" hidden in the small details of the story (Please let me know in the comments if you find one!). Because I'm a lazy asshole, I'm only just getting around to typing this up and posting it now, a year later.  
> I wrote this for Ephy because it's their favourite movie, and it became one of mine after they urged me to watch it. I worked hard on this fic, and I hope that they loved it when they read it for the first time, and that they continue to love it, and that all of you will love it now.  
> Feedback is welcomed and encouraged.  
> New chapters on Fridays.  
> Enjoy.

When Mikey wakes up, his head kind of hurts and there's a crick in his neck. He groans at the light coming in through the window and pulls himself to his feet, and immediately wants to go back to bed.  
He takes his meds and decides it's one of Those Days.  
He calls in sick to work.

He makes it to about midday before he decides he's going stir-crazy and has to get out of the house. That's kind of weird. Mikey normally doesn't go stir-crazy. He's normally perfectly fine with sitting at home in front of his TV. It's one of Those Days, he reminds himself, and gets on the L train.

He'd forgotten that it's Valentines Day until he gets off the train and walks past a 99¢ store with loads of garish pink and red decorations in the window.  
_Fuck Valentines Day,_ Mikey thinks vaguely. _It's a stupid holiday made up by greeting card companies to make everyone feel like shit_ , and he tries to ignore the way his stomach is twisting.

He's sitting in the corner of a Starbucks with a caramel macchiato when the bell tingles and this guy walks in. He's got his black hair spiked up on his head and he's wearing purple pants with his leather jacket. Mikey keeps glancing at him as he orders and pays. He can't help it. The guy's kind of gorgeous. Mikey wonders what his name is. He wonder if anyone's given him a valentine today.  
The next time he glances up, the guy catches his eye and smiles.  
Mikey gulps and looks down at his cup, cursing himself. He doesn't look up again.

He spends most of the rest of the day wandering around Brooklyn. He goes to check if anyone interesting is playing today at The Knitting Factory that he could get tickets for, but it's some indie band he's never heard of and he decides to just go home instead.

He's standing on the empty subway platform when Purple Pants Guy comes down the stairs next to him.  
Mikey gulps and looks straight ahead. He can see the guy out of the corner of his eye and he frowns when he sees him wave.  
He waves vaguely back, even though he's sure he doesn't know that guy. He'd definitely remember if he did.

They end up in the same train car. It's mostly empty aside from them- an old man with a scraggly beard is mumbling to himself in the corner and a young woman is standing near one of the doors with a bag of groceries. Mikey looks out the window at the tunnel lights flashing by. He jumps when a voice says “hi”.  
He looks around. Purple Pants Guy is staring at him expectantly.  
“What?” Mikey asks stupidly.  
“I said... hi.” The guy waves. Mikey blinks.  
“Oh, right. Hi.” Mikey waves back awkwardly and goes back to looking out the window.  
He looks up again when he hears some scrambling. The guy is sitting right in front of him, turned around in his seat to grin at Mikey.  
“Do I know you?” he asks.  
“Uh... no?” It comes out sounding like a question, even though Mikey is totally sure that no, he doesn't know this guy.  
“Really?” The guy squints. “Do you shop at The Academy?”  
Mikey feels a bit dazed as he nods. “Yeah, I do.”  
The guy positively beams, showing all his teeth. “I've seen you! I work there, man!”  
“I haven't seen you,” Mikey blurts out. He doesn't mean to round rude. He's just sure he would remember seeing this man.  
The guy frowns. “Huh. Maybe I'm always wearing long sleeves when you come in.”  
“Long sleeves?”  
“I'm a lot more distinctive without them.”  
Mikey stares at him in confusion until he shrugs off his jacket, revealing a sleeve on one arm and a few scattered tattoos on the other. Mikey's eyes go wide. “Whoa,” he says. “Awesome.”  
The guy points to an owl sitting on a book on his right forearm, still red around the edges. “This is my newest,” he says eagerly.  
Mikey nods. “Awesome. They're awesome.”  
The guy leans against the window and laughs. “You said that already.”  
Mikey wants to smack himself.  
The guy is examining the sleeve on his left arm. “I ink my personality onto my skin,” he says absently. “Probably gives some advance warning to people who aren't going to like me.”  
“I don't know about that,” Mikey mumbles.  
The guy looks irritated suddenly. “Well, you wouldn't, would you? Seeing as you don't know me.”  
“Sorry.” Mikey looks out the window at the station they've just pulled into. He wonders if he should get off and wait for the next train.  
“I'm Pete, by the way,” says the guy suddenly. “Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz III.”  
Mikey raises an eyebrow and tries to hold in a snicker. The guy- Pete- glares. “No jokes about my name,” he warns.  
Mikey blinks. “I don't know any jokes about your name.”  
“'That's a big name for such a little guy'? No?”  
“Uh... no? I guess? I don't know?”  
“Well, okay.” Pete leans over the back of the seat and looks at him expectantly.  
It takes Mikey a moment to catch on. “Oh. I'm Mikey.”  
“It's nice to meet you, Mikey.”  
They shake hands.

When Mikey gets off the train, Pete gets off too.  
He'd known that was going to happen- it had come up during their small talk. But he's a tiny bit surprised when they both start walking in the same direction. Pete's a few paces ahead of him; without thinking about it, Mikey hurries to catch up.  
“Hey,” he says. “Mind if I walk with you?”  
Pete gives him a slightly suspicious look out of the corner of his eye. “Why?”  
That takes Mikey by surprise. He stumbles slightly over a crack in the pavement. “Um,” he says. “Well, we're walking the same way, and... I dunno. You seem nice.”  
Pete groans. It's hardly the reaction Mikey was expecting, and he has to resist the urge to run away.  
“Oh, great. I seem _nice_. God, I hate that word! I don't need nice. I don't need to be it and I don't need anyone to be it at me.”  
Mikey falls back without saying anything else. Pete doesn't seem to mind.  
They walk a few steps away from each other in the same direction for a few minutes before Pete suddenly stops and spins around.  
“Sorry,” he says. “I'm sorry. I'm coming off as crazy. I'm not, really. I'm not crazy.”  
Something about the way he says it makes Mikey walk forward to him. “It's, uh, it's okay,” he says.  
“I'm just kind of fucked up today, you know?”  
Mikey nods, because he does know. He's fucked up today, too.

They stop outside an old Brownstone and Mikey shuffles where he stands, not wanting to say goodbye yet but not wanting to come off as awkward and weird by not leaving.  
“Do you want to come have a drink?” Pete blurts out. “I mean, like, I have lots of drinks. And it would be fun.”  
He looks up at Mikey with hopeful eyes, and Mikey isn't thinking about how this is crazy, and he doesn't do this, and Pete's a stranger. He's thinking exactly what he says.  
“Yes. Yeah, that would be fun.”

The inside of Pete's apartment is cluttered and cramped. There are CDs sitting on practically every surface, and Mikey nods approvingly at the names on some of the cases. Amongst the CDs there are comic books, novels, packages of guitar strings, and pages upon pages of loose-leaf paper, most of them covered in writing. It kind of reminds him of Frank and Gerard's house, except it's somehow kind of sexy.  
“Make yourself at home,” Pete says, going into the kitchen and grabbing some bottles of vodka and drink mix. Mikey moves what appears to be a pile of dirty laundry off the couch and sits down.  
Pete joins him a minute later with a drink in each hand and a smirk on his face. He hands a glass to Mikey and says, “Drink up, young man. It'll make the whole seduction thing a whole lot less sucky.”  
Mikey stares at him. Pete's face slowly splits into a mischevious grin. “Kidding,” he says, and Mikey forces a laugh.  
“You're not much of a talker, are you?” Pete says after a few minutes of silence. He says it like a question but it comes off more like a statement, and makes Mikey feel irrationally defensive.  
“I don't have anything to say.”  
“How?”  
“I don't know? I go to work, I go home, I sleep, I wake up, I go to work. My life just isn't all that interesting.” He manages to refrain from adding a snarky comment to the end of his explanation.  
“Really?” Pete looks genuinely curious. “Doesn't that make you sad? Or anxious? I mean, I'm always worried that I'm not living my life to the fullest, like, taking advantage of every opportunity.”  
Mikey stares at him. Pete's just brought up the very things he tries to avoid thinking about. He doesn't say that, though. Instead, he tries to sound casual. “Really? You think about that?”  
“All the time.”  
They stare at each other for a long moment and burst out laughing.  
“You're really nice!” Pete exclaims. “Shit, now you've got me saying it!”  
He slumps against Mikey's shoulder, and Mikey smiles instead of tensing.  
“Mikey,” he says excitedly. “You should come to Leow's 46th Street Theatre with me. It's this abandoned theatre in Brooklyn from the 1920s.”  
Mikey chuckles awkwardly. “Sounds dangerous.”  
Pete rolls his eyes, but not in a mean way. “I'll pack a picnic- a night picnic, it's different from a normal picnic. What do you say?”  
Mikey is starting to feel a little overwhelmed. He stares down at Pete, who looks slightly wild in his excitement and is playing with Mikey's fingers, and feels a tiny stab of something he can't quite put his finger on. Inferiority, maybe. Mikey doesn't break into abandoned buildings to have night picnics. He wouldn't even think to, not anymore.  
“Uh...” he says. He wants to say no, but Pete's looking at him so hopefully, and he doesn't even know why he cares when Pete's pretty much a stranger, but he does. Like, a lot. “Sounds great. But right now, I gotta get going...”  
“You should stay,” Pete says.  
Something in his voice makes Mikey pause, but he shakes his head and gets up. “No, seriously, dude, I have work tomorrow.”  
Pete pouts like a child and something in Mikey's chest jumps.

“You gotta call me,” Pete says as Mikey pulls his jacket on. “I mean. Like.” His hands fumble in front of him for a moment before he gives up trying to convey meaning and grabs a sharpie off his kitchen counter instead. “Will you call me? I'd like it. A lot.”  
Mikey ends up leaving the apartment with Pete's number and a little X scrawled on the inside of his right arm.  
“Wish me a happy Valentine's day when you call!” Pete shouts from the window, and even though Valentine's Day is a pointless holiday created by greeting card companies, a grin bubbles up inside of Mikey and spills over the edges as he walks away.

When he gets home, he lasts 16 minutes and 5 seconds before he calls Pete.  
“What took you so long?!” Pete asks as soon as he picks up.  
“I just walked in,” Mikey says, setting into his armchair with a tiny smile on his face.  
“Bullshit!” Pete exclaims, but he's laughing. “Do you miss me?”  
“Oddly enough I do,” Mikey admits, and Pete laughs even more. Mikey feels inexplicably delighted at having been the one to cause that sound.  
“Tomorrow night?” Pete asks. “The theatre?” and Mikey says, “Yeah.”

Pete picks the lock on the heavy metal door with surprising and somewhat worrying speed. “Come here often?” Mikey jokes drily as padlock falls open. Pete just nods solemnly and ushers him inside.  
It's a bit hard to take in the full scope of it in the beam of Pete's flashlight, but Mikey kind of gets it, he thinks. Everything the light touches is faded and crumbly, with a haunting kind of beauty to it that's found only when things fall apart. He can see how it would be pretty stunning in the daylight.  
“Are you sure it's like, structurally sound?” he can't help but ask. Pete snorts, and Mikey feels slightly ridiculous.  
They make their way down the stairs to the floor in front of the stage. Pete immediately flops down onto his ass. “Ow,” he says, almost conversationally, and gestures for Mikey to join him.  
Mikey sits down more carefully than Pete did. He settles next to him, their knees touching just enough to make Mikey blush.  
“I think I just heard a ceiling beam crack,” Mikey says darkly, tucking his face into Pete's neck. “We're gonna die.”  
“Jesus!” Pete whacks Mikey's arm lightly, giggling. “The roof's not gonna fuckin' collapse! It's safe, you're fine.”  
Mikey huffs out a laugh against Pete's skin, and lets him take his hand.  
“This is where I come when I run out of meds or something,” Pete says. Mikey can get that. He knows what that can be like. He can see how the atmosphere of this place affords a kind of calm that can sometimes be impossible to find inside your own head. It's nice. Mikey likes it.  
Eventually, Pete asks him what his favourite song by The Smiths is, They end up murmuring to each other about metaphors until sunlight comes peeking through the cracked-open door.

Pete falls asleep on the drive home. Mikey has to work to focus on the road instead of the curves of Pete's lips and the look of peace on his face.  
He doesn't want to wake him when they pull up outside the Brownstone, but he has to, of course. He shakes his shoulder gently and smiles softly as Pete grabs his hand.  
“We're there,” Mikey says, and Pete blinks blearily at him.  
“Right, yeah,” he mumbles, looking at the Brownstone unenthusiastically. “Can I come over to your place instead? To sleep? I'm so tired.”  
Mikey doesn't ask why Pete can't sleep in his own bed. He just nods.  
Pete goes inside to get his toothbrush and a change of clothes. Mikey sits back in his seat and closes his eyes. They snap open again when there's a tap on the window.  
It's a guy, a young guy, younger than Mikey, with floppy brown hair and a frown on his face. Mikey rolls his window down. “Uh... yes?”  
The guy fidgets. “Can I help you?”  
“What?” Mikey can't help but feel like he should know what this guy is talking about, which is completely ridiculous because, _what_.  
“Can I help you with something?” The guy says it like he expects the two extra words to clarify his meaning. Mikey just stares at him blankly.  
“I'm sorry, I, uh. I don't know what you're asking me.”  
“Oh.” The guy looks oddly relieved. “Okay. Have a nice day, sir.”  
Mikey frowns in confusion and rolls his window back up.


	2. Intermezzo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Please never mention him again._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Mikey can't stop crying. His chest heaves and his shoulders shudder and his hands clench so tightly on the steering wheel that his knuckles go white. He's glad it's so late and he doesn't have to share the road with other people, because he's fucking blinded.  
The Boy With the Thorn In His Side comes up next on the CD in the player. Mikey ejects it and throws it out the window onto the road.

“Valentines Day tomorrow,” says Brian from down the hall as Mikey unlocks his mailbox. “Got any plans with Pete?”  
Mikey wants to cry again. “No,” he mumbles, grabbing the pile of what looks like junk mail and shoving it under his arm without giving it a second glance.  
“What?! Dude! Better get cracking finding reservations or something. You don't wanna end up at home with takeout.”  
Mikey nods and smiles weakly. He walks past Brian without looking at him. “I have to go to bed now.”  
Brian sounds puzzled when he replies, “It's 8 o'clock.”

“Showtime at the Apollo,” William says quietly when the lights in the Way guy's window go out. He pulls the van into the building's parking lot and stops it near the entrance.  
They struggle through the lobby door and up to the second floor, each holding one end of a big cardboard box. William's companion, a younger man with brown hair and thick-framed glasses, reads the numbers on the doors out loud as they walk past.  
“262... 264... 266...”  
“Brendon, be quiet,” William hisses. “286. This is it.”  
He balances his half of the box against his hip, clutching at it with one hand as he turns the door handle.  
“Whoa,” says Brendon as they walk into the apartment. “This place is /boring/.”  
William rolls his eyes. “Come on, we need to get started.”  
They set the box down on a table next to the pull-out bed where the Way guy is passed out. William starts unpacking it; he hands Brendon a strange-looking contraption, which Brendon starts to strap on to the Way guy's head.  
The machine whirs to life and connects to William's computer. He presses a few buttons and sits back. “Here we go.”

“Valentine's Day tomorrow. Got any plans with Pete?”  
“No.”  
“What?! Dude! Better get cracking finding reservations or something. You don't wanna end up at home with takeout.”  
Mikey stares at himself, standing in front of the mailboxes. “What the hell,” he mutters as Brian goes blurry. He vaguely hears “It's 8 o'clock” but the sound is distorted and tinny. He blinks at the mailboxes in front of him.

William clicks a button and nods at Brendon. “Got it- Brendon, put that down.”  
Brendon rolls his eyes and sets down the statuette he's holding. “You need to relax.”  
 _Click click click._

“No, Mikey...”  
“'No, Mikey' what, Gerard? Valentine's Day is, like, three days away. I gotta fix this!”  
Gerard gives him a pitying look. Mikey looks down at the floor so he doesn't have to see it.  
“I tried calling him earlier but he's changed his number.”  
He glances at Frank, who looks thoroughly unsurprised. Mikey can't help but feel like both of them were expecting this. He doesn't like it.  
“So I went into The Academy earlier. I thought I could apologize, get him to talk to me, and...” He looks at Gerard desperately. “You won't believe it. He was there with this... guy. This young guy. And he just looked at me, like he didn't even know me.”

When Mikey walks into The Academy, he ignores the CD racks and the couple of people hanging around and goes straight to the counter at the back. Pete's sitting there chewing on his thumbnail and reading a book; the cover reads , _Ecstasy: Three Tales of Chemical Romance._  
He shoves his hands into his pockets and takes a deep breath.  
“Um,” he says.  
Pete looks up; Mikey flinches, expecting a glare or a cold look. Instead, Pete just stares at him blankly.  
“Can I help you, sir?” he says politely.  
“Um,” Mikey says again.  
Before he has a chance to think of something smooth to say, the Employees Only door behind Pete swings open; Mikey catches the flash of glasses before the guy trips and falls to the floor. Pete bursts out laughing, putting his book down and dropping to his knees beside the guy, who's got his head down as he picks up the papers that have spilled out of his bag.  
“You okay, Brenny?” Pete asks; the fondness in his voice makes Mikey's stomach twist uneasily.  
And then, as if it's nothing, Pete is leaning in and kissing the guy, tilting his head so it's straight on the mouth.  
Mikey thinks he's going to be sick.  
He stands there, frozen, until Pete breaks away and looks up at him. “Let me know if you need anything, sir,” he says, his tone clipped and professional.  
Mikey continues to stand there like an idiot for a few seconds before turning and practically running out of the store.  
The lights go out behind him.

He's back in Frank and Gerard's living room, with the two of them looking uncomfortably at each other from opposite sides of the room. He sits heavily down on the stairs and puts his head in his hands.  
“How could he do that to me?” he mumbles.  
There is a long and awkward pause.  
“...Anyone want a joint?” Frank asks.  
“Give it a rest, Frank!” Gerard sighs, sounding thoroughly exasperated.  
“Maybe I'll go to his place or something,” Mikey muses.  
“No!” Frank yelps; Mikey stares at him and Gerard rolls his eyes. Frank's eyes widen and he backtracks. “You don't want to do that, man. You'll seem desperate.”  
“Just see it as a clean break?” Gerard suggests; Mikey can't help but notice his hopeful tone. He puts his head back in his hands and doesn't say anything. He can feel both of them staring at him.  
“Listen, Mikey,” Frank says finally; Mikey looks up to see him rooting through the side table drawer. He pulls out an envelope and holds it out.  
“Frank!” Gerard snaps. “What the fuck are you doing?!”  
“Well, what's your brilliant suggestion, Gerard?!” Frank snaps back. “What's your genius solution?!”  
“Don't make this about us! This is about Mikey!”  
“I agree, this is about Mikey! Who's an _adult_ , not your fucking baby brother!”  
For a moment, Mikey thinks Gerard's going to hit Frank. Instead, he storms past Mikey up the stairs. The sound of a door slamming echoes through the house; Frank sighs heavily and holds the envelope out to Mikey, who gets up to take and open it.  
 _Dear Mr and Mr Iero-Way,_  
 _Pete Wentz has had Mikey Way erased from his memory. Please never mention him again._  
“...Okay,” Mikey says.  
 _Dear Mr and Mr Iero-Way,_  
 _has had Mikey Way erased from his memory. Please never mention him again._  
“What is it?!” Mikey yells; his hands are shaking.  
“I don't know,” says Frank. “It's some place that does a thing.”  
The card goes blank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated! New chapters on Fridays.


	3. Volti Subito

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the outside, Falta Inc. is unassuming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry about the lack of update last week! But you'll be happy to know that the delay was because I had the chapter typed up, but decided it was too short and combined it with the next chapter. So, you guys get an extra long chapter this week! I hope you enjoy!

From the outside, Falta Inc. is unassuming, set beside a dry cleaners and with a subtle sign placed in the corner of the window. On the inside it's not much different; it looks like any other waiting room, with several vaguely uncomfortable-looking chairs, most of which are empty, placed around the perimeter of the room; there's a coffee table in the middle covered in old magazines.  
When Mikey walks in, the other other occupants of the waiting room are a middle aged, balding man, who is holding a garbage bag in his lap, and the receptionist, who is on the phone.  
“No, I'm sorry, that offer's expired,” the receptionist says calmly to whoever he's talking to. “However, we do have a new offer on for Valentine's Day...”  
Mikey approaches the counter and stands there awkwardly. The receptionist, whose nametag says Gabe, glances up at him, smiles politely, and holds up a finger.  
Mikey waits.  
“Of course... sure, I can fit you in then... two o'clock? Alright, see you then. You too, ma'am.”  
The phone makes a click noise as it's put back in the cradle. The receptionist, Gabe, turns his attention to Mikey. “How can I help you?”  
“I'm Mikey Way... I have an appointment to see a Doctor-”  
“-Asher, yes.” Gabe hands him a clipboard with several forms on it.  
“I just want to talk to her.”  
“You still need to fill out the forms.”  
Mikey sighs and sits down on the far side of the room. _Full name: Michael James Way. Date of Birth: September 10, 1980._  
“Falta Incorporated. No. I'm sorrry, that offer's expired. But we do have a new offer on for Valentine's Day. 15% off your first treatment. Sure. Sure. I can fit you in on Thursday of next week. At three. Okay, see you then.”  
A young man pokes his head through the doorway behind Gabe, long hair swinging around his shoulders. “Gabe? Dr. Asher's ready.”  
Gabe grins over his shoulder and beckons to Mikey. “Mr Way? The doctor will see you now.”

“You should not have seen this. I apologize.”  
Dr. Asher plays with the card between her fingers, looking down at it with a small frown on her face. Mikey stares at her, waiting for her to explain, to tell him that it's an elaborate hoax or something, that it's not real. She doesn't say anything at all. She just sits there, seemingly lost in thought.  
“This isn't real,” Mikey says, shaking his head. Dr. Asher looks up at him; he doesn't like the sympathetic look on her face.  
“Oh, I can assure you, it's very real.”  
“It can't be real. This doesn't happen in real life.”  
She places the card down on the table and folds her hands together. “Our patient files are confidential, Mr. Way, so I can't give you proof, but once again, I assure you that our procedure is very real, and it works.”  
He sits there staring at her, trying to take it in. Either everyone in this building was completely crazy, or he could walk into The Academy right now and Pete wouldn't know who he is. With a start, he realizes that's already happened.  
“Suffice it to say,” says Dr. Asher, “that Mr. Wentz was not happy, and he wanted to move on. We provide that possibility.”

“ _Mr. Wentz was not happy and he wanted to move on. We provide that possibility,_ ” Mikey mimics. He'd gone straight from Falta Inc. to Frank and Gerard's. His head is an absolute mess and he just wants his older brother.  
“I know,” Gerard hums sympathetically, chopping up a French onion on the counter opposite Mikey. “Well, what can I say, Mikes? Pete's just... like that.”  
“Like what?”  
“You know.” Gerard looks up and gives him an earnest look. “Impulsive.”  
Mikey looks at him stonily, because seriously. “Impulsive” does not explain this away.  
“He probably decided to erase you, y'know, on a lark,” Gerard continues, turning to throw the onion into the pot on the stove.  
“On a lark,” Mikey repeats monotonously. “Well, that's just fucking great.”

He ends up at Leow's 46th Steet Theatre. Pete had never taught him how to pick the lock; he bangs his hands against the metal door, body shaking with sobs, and hopes he's not making too much noise.

He can't help but think that Dr. Asher doesn't look all that surprised when he comes barging into her office the next morning. The secretary, Gabe, is chasing after him, yelling yet trying to maintain some sort of professional air, but Mikey doesn't give a shit. He doesn't care. He didn't sleep last night and he's exhausted and angry and heartbroken and he just doesn't care about being polite.  
“I want it done,” he says to Dr. Asher.  
“I'm sorry, Victoria, he just came barging in!” Gabe says breathlessly as he catches up. “I told him, pre-Valentine's Day is our busiest time and there are other people waiting-”  
“That's okay, Gabe,” Dr. Asher interrupts with a small smile. “I'll see him now.”  
“But there are people waiting!”  
Dr. Asher turns to Mikey. “Mr. Way, please come in.”  
She nods a dismissal to Gabe, who looks slightly crestfallen, and shuts the door behind her.  
“Now, Mr. Way,” she says as she settles in her chair. “The first thing we need you to do is collect everything you own that has some association, any association, with Pete. Anything. Letters, photographs, souvenirs, whatever. You need to be very thorough with this, because we'll use these items to create a 'map' of Pete in your brain. You need to essentially empty your home, and empty your life, of Pete. And when the mapping is done, we'll do the erasing in your home at night. That way, when you wake up, everything is normal. It'll be as if nothing had happened.”

Mikey goes home. He rips pictures out of frames and photo albums. He takes magnets off of the fridge. He shoves letter and lyrics and silly little notes into a trash bag with a strange sort of relish, and he throws every album he owns by The Smiths in on top of them. A white denim jacket is dug out of his laundry basket and added to the mix; he pretends he doesn't falter putting it into the bag.  
He feels a vindictive pleasure as he ties the top of the bag closed.

“February's our busiest month, because of Valentine's Day,” Dr. Asher says conversationally as she leads Mikey down the hallway to her office. She pauses to open a door labelled _Mapping Room A._  
There's a woman inside, seated in a chair with a strange-looking contraption placed over her head. She's laughing, watching a film reel of what looks like an opera performance, and she doesn't seem to notice Mikey and Dr. Asher standing in the doorway.  
The guy with the long hair who Mikey'd seen on his first visit to the clinic is sitting hunched over in front of a computer next to the woman's chair. He stands up hurriedly when Dr. Asher clears her throat.  
“Mr Way, this is William Beckett, one of our best technicians. He'll be working on you tonight.”  
“It's nice to meet you, Mr Way,” says William politely. Mikey nods at him, his mouth set in a grim line.

“My name is Mikey Way and I'm here to erase Pete Wentz.”  
His mouth feels dry as he says it. He licks his lips and shifts slightly in his seat.  
“Very good,” says Dr. Asher, giving him an encouraging smile. “Don't let the recorder intimidate you. Just tell me about Pete.”  
The tape recorder sitting in front of him is only intimidating now that she's mentioned it. Mikey sighs.  
“Okay. Uh. Well. A couple of years ago, my brother, Gerard, and his husband, Frank, invited me to this concert at The Knitting Factory, and I had nothing better to do, so I went. And I met Pete.”  
There's a sudden clatter behind them. Mikey turns and sees a flash of brown hair as someone stoops to pick up a bunch of dropped CDs, mumbling an apology.

“We'll start with the most recent memories,” says Dr. Asher as she checks his blood pressure. Mikey blocks her out as she starts explaining the technicalities of the procedure. He tries his best not to think of Pete's lips.

He's taken into _Mapping Room C_ , which is almost identical to _Mapping Room A_. He tries to ignore how apprehensive he feels as the weird device is lowered onto his head.  
“Comfortable, Mr. Way?” William asks as he presses buttons on his computer; Mikey bites back the answer he wants to give, which is “not really”, and nods stiffly.  
“What we're doing here, Mr. Way, is actually creating a map of your brain,” William says. Mikey nods like that's a perfectly normal everyday occurance.  
“Let's get started,” says Dr. Asher crisply. “If we want to get the procedure underway tonight we've got some work to do.”  
There's a small table in front of Mikey. William adjusts it so it stands a little taller, more in Mikey's line of sight; he grabs one of Mikey's garbage bags.  
“I want you to react to these objects,” he says, and places a stuffed bear on the table.  
Mikey can't help but smile. “There's actually a funny story behind this one,” he says, thinking of summers and fairs and stupid overpriced games. “Pete-”  
“Actually, I'll get a more accurate emotional read if you could refrain from talking, please?” William interrupts. “Just try to focus on the memories.”  
Mikey feels like an idiot. “Sorry,” he mumbles.  
“Healthy emotional readouts,” says Dr. Asher, peering at the screen of William's computer. “Healthy activity, that's good.”  
“Here's another object.”  
A broken Nintendo DS. A tattered black hoodie. Photos. Pete laughing. Pete smiling. Pete showing off a new tattoo. Pete in his bathing suit in a waterpark. Pete. Pete. Pete. Pete.  
Everything is going fuzzy. Colours are blurring into each other. “Just try to focus on the memories.” William's voice sounds tinny and far away. Mikey feels like he can't breathe.  
“Brendon, can you do me a favour?”

“Brendon, can you do me a favour?”  
“Yeah?” Brendon looks up from where he's sitting cross-legged on the ground.  
William frowns at his screen and taps a few keys. “Can you check the voltage regulator? See if the voltage is, y'know, okay?”  
Brendon shifts over and looks. “Voltage seems fine.”  
“Really?” William sighs. “I'm not wiping as clean as I'd like here. Can you check the connections?”

Mikey's sitting in Dr. Asher's office, a blood pressure meter wrapped around his arm. She's nowhere in sight. She's supposed to be here. She was here before.  
He eventually finds her in _Mapping Room C_. “There you are,” he says in relief. “I was looking for-”  
He cuts off when he notices that the person sitting in the chair with the contraption is himself.  
“Next object,” says William. He places an LP on the table.  
“I don't understand what I'm looking at here,” says Mikey blankly. “How am I here... but also there?” He blinks a few times. “Fuck. Deja vu. Seriously. Deja vu.”  
Dr. Asher turns to him and removes the blood pressure meter from his arm. “Let's get started. If we want-”  
“-to get the procedure underway tonight we've got some work to do,” Mikey finishes with her. “I'm in my head already, aren't I?”  
Dr. Asher looks around. “Hmm, yes,” she says musingly. “Yes, this is about what it would look like, yeah.”  
Mikey looks around in awe. “Badass,” he breathes.  
“Very good,” says William. He puts the LP aside.  
“We'll dispose of these mementos when we're done here. That way you won't be confused by their inexpicable presence in your home.” Mikey has to hold back a fistpump as he ssays exactly what Dr. Asher says, word perfect, in unison.  
“Badass,” he says again.

“Aah, there we go,” says William, tossing his hair back. “Brendon?”

Mikey frowns. “Brendon?”  
“Brendon?” says the Mikey in the chair.

“Can you check the red wire? I'm getting some kind of read off my own voice.”  
Brendon nods. “Red wire,” he mutters. “Got it.”

“Brendon,” Mikey repeats. Brendon. Brendon.  
He's sitting in the chair. Everything is hazy.  
“Ah, notes. Those could be invaluable,” says Dr. Asher. William starts reading one out loud; he flickers in and out of focus, and his voice is distorted and strange.  
“I don't know what to do. I met a guy. His name's Pete and he's amazing. I don't know what to do his name's Pete and he's amazing his name's Pete I met a guy I don't know what to do his name's Pete and he's amazing.”  
Mikey's head feels like it's splitting open. He can hear screaming. It takes him a moment to realize it's him.

“Brendon, jesus!” William yelps as the Way guy jolts on the bed.  
Brendon jumps, smacking his head on the table. “Ow! Fuck!” he groans. “What? It's fine!”  
“You're gonna fry the guy! God!”  
“Okay, jeez.” Brendon gets up and starts looking around the room again.  
“This place is kind of a dump, don't you think?” he asks. “Kinda sad.”  
“It's an apartment, Brendon.”  
“Yeah, I know that, thanks.” He rolls his eyes. “It just feels kind of, like, lifeless.”  
“Can we please just get through this?” William says in exasperation. “We have a long night ahead of us, and I just wanna get this done and go home and sleep.”  
“Yeah, no, of course,” Brendon says hurriedly. He resumes his cross-legged position on the floor.  
There's a few moments of silence, broken only by William clicking buttons, before William says casually, “Gabe's coming over.”  
“I like Gabe,” says Brendon, seeming a bit sad. “He's a cool guy. I just don't think he likes me.”  
William shrugs. “He likes you well enough.”  
“Well, if Gabe is coming over, maybe I'll invite _my_ boyfriend.” Brendon sounds pretty pleased with himself. “I have a boyfriend now.”  
“Uh huh,” says William absently. “Cool.”  
Brendon frowns up at him. “Didn't I tell you I have a boyfriend now?”  
“Uh... no.”  
“Oh. Well, I do.”  
“Good for you, buddy,” William says sarcastically.  
Brendon gets up and goes into the kitchen, where he pulls two beers out of the fridge.  
“We gotta focus here,” says William, but he takes a beer anyway.  
“Our situation is a little odd,” Brendon confesses. “The situation with me and my boyfriend, I mean.”  
William snorts. “I bet it is.”  
“Fuck off,” Brendon says indignantly. “Don't be an asshole.”  
“Sorry.” William holds his hands up defensively, trying to contain laughter.  
Brendon fidgets a bit. “You remember that guy we did last week? With all the tattoos?”  
William raises an eyebrow and looks up, interest piqued. “Yeah, that's this guy's guy.”  
Brendon sighs dreamily. “I kinda fell in love with him that night.”  
William stares at him. “He was unconcious!”  
“I know!” Brendon whines. “But he was so beautiful... and then the next day I kinda... went to his work and asked him out.”  
“Brendon!” William looks horrified. “Do you have any idea how fucking unenthical that is?!”  
“Is not,” Brendon mumbles sullenly. William sighs and goes back to clicking buttons.


	4. Mancando

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's four AM and Mikey doesn't know where Pete is.

It's four AM and Mikey is sitting in the living room, fighting back exhaustion with questions and annoyance. The isn't the first time this has happened, and he doubts it will be the last. He's tired and afraid and part of him wants to go collapse into bed and deal with this in the morning. But he can't, not this time. In the morning, this won't matter the way it does now.  
It's four AM and Mikey doesn't know where Pete is.  
Again.  
When he finally comes in, it's like he doesn't even notice Mikey sitting there. He throws his hoodie onto the couch and wanders into the kitchen, where he pours himself a glass of water. Mikey clears his throat. If Pete hears him, he ignores him.  
“It's four AM,” says Mikey.  
“Yeah,” says Pete.  
He comes into the living room and flops down onto the couch, closing his eyes. Mikey stares at him and takes in his slightly rumpled appearance.  
“Where've you been?”  
“Out.”  
“I see that.”  
Pete cracks an eye open at him. He looks vaguely annoyed. “What's the big deal anyway?”  
“Pete,” Mikey says in frustration. “It's four AM.”  
“Sorry, mom, did I miss curfew?”  
“Fuck off.” Mikey sighs and puts a hand over his tired eyes.  
Pete doesn't fuck off. He gives Mikey a mocking look and sits up a little straighter. Mikey's realized by now that Pete's drunk, but he doesn't mention it. Pete's clearly aggravated enough as it is.  
“You're afraid I've fucked someone!” Pete declares. He seems vaguely amused by this notion. Mikey's mouth opens; words come falling out before he's finished processing them.  
“No, I assume you've fucked someone. That's how you get people to like you.”  
He instantly wishes he hadn't said it. Pete's half-amused, half-mocking expression morphs into one of shock, then of rage.  
He leaps to his feet and snatches his hoodie up from the arm of the sofa. Mikey closes his eyes.  
“I'm sorry,” he mumbles. “I didn't mean that...”  
The door slams.  
Mikey hauls himself to his feet, cursing. He follows Pete out of the building and down the street about a block before he catches up.  
“Let me walk you home.”  
“Fuck off.”  
He remembers this. And he really has no desire to repeat it. He stops in his tracks and lets Pete walk off down the road.  
“I'm erasing you!” he screams after him. “Do you hear me, Pete?! I'm erasing you! By morning you'll be gone!” He laughs, a little hysterically. “It's the perfect ending to this piece of shit story!”  
He turns on his heel and takes a few paces back in the direction of his apartment before turning back in the direction he'd just come, ready to give Pete another piece of his mind.

“What? It's not that bad, come on! Quit looking at me lke that!”  
“Brendon, you 'fell in love' with a dude while he was _sleeping_! It's creepy!”

Mikey looks around for the source of the voices but it's quickly distracted by a sinking feeling in his gut. He stares after Pete.  
 _This is the last time I saw you._


	5. Crescendo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Gentlemen. Let's get the evening underway."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy! Comments and kudos are really appreciated!

Mikey’s sitting on the couch with a tray of grocery store sushi, which he’s eating slowly. He glances to his side at Pete, who’s devouring his Personal Pizza with a sort of single-minded intensity, and smiles fondly.

Brendon chews his lip worriedly. “Okay, like, I know it’s a bit creepy. But I didn’t do it on purpose. What was I supposed to do?”

Mikey frowns and looks up. The TV is off. He looks around the room and doesn’t see anyone.  
“What?” Pete says. 

William runs a hand through his hair. “I dunno…”  
“I’m not doing any harm, right?” Brendon looks slightly pleading. “I just went and asked him out…”  
William still doesn’t feel quite right about it, but shrugs in defeat. “I guess not.”

“There’s someone here,” says Mikey, sitting up a bit straighter.  
Pete raises an eyebrow. “I don’t see anyone.”  
Mikey gets up. He looks in the kitchen. There’s no one there. There’s no one in the washroom either.  
When he goes back to the main room, the couch is gone. The food is gone. Pete’s gone. The room is empty.

“Hola, amigos!”  
Gabe comes striding into the apartment with his usual bravado. He tosses his purple hoodie onto the chair by the door, walks over to William, and plants a kiss on his lips. William turns a bit pink; Brendon rolls his eyes. He goes to walk past Gabe and look at the books on the bookshelf, but trips over a wire and almost fall on his face, causing Gabe to burst out laughing.  
“It’s amateur night at the Apollo Creed!” Gabe hoots. “Shit, man, how did you even get this job with those two left feet?”  
Brendon laughs awkwardly. Gabe picks up William’s beer and examines it.  
“Oh, come on. Doesn’t this guy have anything real to drink?”  
William shrugs. “Dunno, haven’t checked yet. Brendon?”  
Brendon sighs and goes to check the kitchen. As he leaves the room, Gabe turns his attention to the Way guy, passed out on the bed.  
“Poor bastard,” he chuckles. “We can’t wake him up, can we? We’re being pretty noisy.”  
William shakes his head. “Nope, can’t wake him up.”  
“Cool.” Gabe looks very pleased about the fact that he can now be as noisy as he wants.  
Brendon returns with a bottle of vodka and some shot glasses. Gabe smirks.  
“Gentlemen,” he says solemnly. “Let’s get the evening underway.”

“I’m an open book,” Pete is saying. “Christ, Mikey, I tell you everything. I tell you everything I think.”  
Mikey can hear him, but he can’t see him. His eyes are closed. He remembers that.  
Pete shifts his head on Mikey’s chest. Mikey cracks his eyes open to look at him and doesn’t let his expression change when he sees Pete’s indignant look.  
“I want you to tell me things,” Pete whines. “You never tell me what you’re thinking.”  
Mikey shuts his eyes again. “Don’t have anything to say,” he mumbles.  
“What do you mean, you don’t have anything to say?! Everyone has things to say. Everyone has thoughts. You could just fucking voice them once in a while.  
“I don’t think about anything interesting.” Mikey’s voice is flat and dull. He wonders why he sounds like that.  
He can practically feel Pete roll his eyes.  
“Fine. Just never talk to me about anything ever, that’s fine,” Pete grumbles.  
Mikey doesn’t think before snapping back, “Talking constantly isn’t communicating, Pete. In fact, it’s just fucking annoying.”  
There’s a pause in which Mikey realizes exactly what he just said. Pete suddenly sits bolt upright.  
“What the fuck are you implying?” His voice is scathing.  
Mikey sinks into his pillow and tries to tune out Pete’s rising voice.


	6. Tremolo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He stares at Pete and wonders, with a sinking feeling in his gut, if they're one of those couples people feel bad for in restaurants.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm soooo sorry that it's been so long since I last updated! My personal life got a bit crazy. There won't be such a long delay again, promise!  
> a note about the name of the chapter: the most common meaning of "tremolo" is "a rapid reiteration of the same note", but it can also be a rapid reiteration between two notes; that's what i mean in this case!  
> Kudos and reviews are much appreciated!!

They're sitting in Roberta's on either side of a table for two. The silence is somewhat chilly. Mikey doesn't like it. He stares at Pete and wonders, with a sinking feeling in his gut, if they're one of those couples people feel bad for in restaurants.  
Mikey can't stand that idea. They're not one of those couples. He proves it to anyone who may be thinking that, or maybe to himself, by reaching forward and covering Pete's hand on the table with his own.  
Pete gives him a brittle smile and pulls his hand away to pick up his glass. "Hey, Mikey? Can you stop fucking leaving your shoes in the middle of the doorway? I'm gonna end up tripping and breaking my neck."  
"Of course, yeah," Mikey says hurriedly. "Sorry."  
Pete hums and goes back to eating. Mikey stares down at his plate and hopes.

"Brendon, can we please just fucking get through this?"  
Brendon pouts at William and presses his phone to his ear. "I'm just calling my boyfr- oh, hey Peter Pan!"  
William watches Brendon's exaggerated pout turn into a genuine frown, hears the distressed voice on the other end, and thinks _shit_.

"Oh, hey Peter Pan!"  
Mikey's head snaps up from his plate. He looks around the restaurant with huge eyes. No one in the restaurant seems to be looking at them, and besides, the voice is too loud and distorted to be another patron.  
When he looks back at Pete, their table is sitting in front of The Academy.  
Mikey gets up and goes in. He can see himself standing at the counter, looking tense and awkward, and practically runs over.

_"Oh. Brendon. It's you."_  
"What's wrong?" Brendon chews his lip anxiously.  
 _"I'm just fucking_ miserable _right now. I don't even know why!"_  
"Hey, calm down, it's okay..."

Pete. That's definitely Pete's voice on the other end of the phone. But who the fuck is calling him, and why can Mikey _hear_ him?  
Mikey goes behind the counter, behind the guy picking up spilled papers from his bag. He grabs the guy's shoulder and yanks roughly. The guy turns, but Mikey can't see his face. He can't see anything but the back of the guy's head, no matter how much the rest of his body moves.

_"Do you think I'm crazy?"_ On the other end of the phone, Pete's crying despite himself.  
Brendon's eyebrows draw together. "What?! No! Maybe... maybe I should come over."

The restaurant is empty except for the table Pete and Mikey had been sitting at. Pete's gone. Mikey sits down and tries to tune out the conversation that he's hearing. _It doesn't matter,_ he tells himself. _You're erasing him anyway._  
That kind of makes him feel worse.

_"I dunno, Brendon... I'm kind of a mess right now..."_  
"Well, let me come over and I'll cheer you up."  
 _"Okay..."_  
Brendon pulls the phone away from his ear and covers the mouthpiece with his hand. "William? Can I leave for a bit?" he says pleadingly. "My boyfriend is really upset."  
"Brendon!" William groans. "We're right in the middle of erasing this poor man's-"  
"No, go!" Gabe interrupts. "It's fine, I can help!"  
Brendon gives William puppy dog eyes and William sighs. "Fine, whatever."  
Brendon grins and presses the phone to his ear again. "I'll be right over, Peter Pan."

"You like?"  
Mikey sits up a little on the couch and looks at the finger Pete is extending to him. He can see his new tattoo on his forearm, under a layer of plastic wrap and taped down with bandages. It's an owl sitting on top of a book, and Pete's been excited about getting it for the past month, but he got "something extra" while he was at it and he seems more excited about that than his owl.  
Mikey shifts his attention from Pete's arm to his finger and a grin splits across his face when he sees the little "2*R" tattooed on the side.  
"You like?" Pete repeats, and Mikey nods enthusiastically.  
"It's fucking awesome, Pete," he says, before adding "Pan. You're my Peter Pan."  
Pete giggles and straddles Mikey's lap. "Come to Neverland with me, Michael Darling," he says. "Be my lost boy."  
"Are you allowed to screw your lost boys?" Mikey quips, and Pete throws his head back and laughs.  
"I'm Peter Pan, I can do what I want," he eventually decides, and gets off of Mikey. "And right now, I want a coffee."  
He goes through to the kitchen and Mikey frowns. "Peter Pan," he repeats to himself, and gets up to follow Pete. "How does he know to call you that?"  
The kitchen is empty.

"Harry Potter, like, inspired a generation, you know?" William says eagerly, shifting to prop himself up on one elbow and look up at Gabe. On the other side of the bed, Gabe raises his joint to his lips and draws in a lungful of smoke. William gets distracted by the shape of his lips briefly before continuing what he was saying. "Like, fucking magic and shit. And kids were like _whoa!_ And everyone _believed_ , man."  
"It's amazing, isn't it?" Gabe says, tilting his head awkwardly to try and look at Way from his lying-down position.  
"It's totally amazing!" William exclaims. "And-"  
"What Vicky gives to the world?" Gabe interrupts, sounding dreamy.  
William thinks he feels himself physically deflate. "Yeah," he mumbles, reaching over to pluck the joint out of Gabe's fingers and put it to his own lips. "Amazing."  
"Like... a fresh start. She takes people's regrets and fears and phobias and makes them just go away. It's fantastic!"  
"Yeah," William mumbles again. "It's... it's really fantastic."

Pete answers the door with red eyes and a scowl on his face. Brendon's face falls as he steps past him into the apartment.  
"Pete... what's going on?" he asks anxiously.  
Pete runs a hand through his hair in frustration and starts pacing. "I dunno. I don't know! I... I'm lost, and I'm scared, I feel like I'm disappearing...!"  
Brendon stares at him with wide eyes. "Disappearing?"  
Pete ignores him. "I'm getting old, my skin's falling off, nothing makes any sense to me...!" He stops pacing and puts his hands over his face. "Nothing makes any sense," he repeats. "Nothing makes any sense."  
"Peter Pan," Brendon says helplessly, going to give him a hug. Before he has a chance, Pete drops his hands from his face.  
"Hey," he says eagerly. "Let's go dancing!"  
Brendon stares at him in confusion. "Uh... sure. We can go danc-"  
"No, wait. Let's go to Leow's 46th Street Theatre! Yeah. Let's go to the theatre, I wanna go to the theatre."  
"Sure," Brendon says, taken aback. "We can go this weekend."  
"No, now. I wanna go to the theatre now."

William's dancing like an idiot and laughing his ass off at Gabe's David Bowie impression when the phone starts to ring. He stumbles off the bed to answer it, almost tripping over Gabe's discarded jeans in the process.  
"Hello?" he says breathlessly, putting a hand over his other ear so he can hear over the music.  
"Bill, hey," says Brendon from the other end. "I'm having a bit of a situation with my boyfrend... I don't think I can make it back tonight. I'm so sorry, man."  
"Dude, it's totally fine." William glances over at Gabe, who's still dancing around in his boxers. "It's fine, man. I'll see you, I gotta go."  
He hangs up before Brendon can say anything else and clambers back onto the bed, grabbing Gabe's hips and giggling as Gabe starts to sashay.

When Pete goes to get changed, Brendon gulps and digs into his bag. He tries not to let any papers fall out as he looks for some kind of clue. He pushes aside CDs and a white denim jacket. "Theatre," he mutters. "46th Street Theatre."  
A photograph catches his eye. It's Pete and Mikey, cheeks pressed together, laughing happily. _46th St Theatre_ is scribbled along the bottom. Brendon flips it over.  
 _Me and you,_ it says on the back in Pete's handwriting. _"I could die right now. I'm just happy. I've never felt like this before. I'm exactly where I want to be."_  
He reads it over a few times and shoves it back into his bag.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> btw, here's pete finger tattoo: http://media.tumblr.com/77ff583a6f899876c281c2a0e08df1a1/tumblr_inline_mj3ar0ChM21qz4rgp.jpg


	7. Interlude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Am I crazy?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to upload despite all this Fall Out Boy-reading-fanfiction bullshit. This chapter is mega-short. Like, it's pretty much one paragraph. Enjoy.

"Am I crazy?"  
Mikey turns his head to the side, feeling the blanket shift on top of them. He can faintly see Pete in the semidarkness; he reaches out and takes his hand.  
"Am I crazy, Mikey?" Pete repeats. Mikey moves closer to him when he hears Pete's voice crack, and wishes he could take away all of his pain.  
"I don't think you're crazy," he says softly.  
"I feel crazy."  
Mikey knows that Pete feels crazy, and he knows that pills and doctors don't always make him feel any less so. He knows that sometimes he can't sleep, and that people make him feel as anxious as they make him feel alive. Pete is staring at him with tears in his eyes. Mikey pulls him in close and kisses his cheeks, his brow, his jaw, every part of him that his lips can reach. "You're perfect," he murmurs. "You're perfect. You're perfect."  
"Mikey," Pete whimpers, turning his neck to the side to give Mikey access to his neck ("You're perfect"). "Don't ever leave me..."  
 _Please,_ Mikey thinks. _Just let me keep this. Just this one._


	8. Affrettando

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Concentrate!" Mikey says urgently.  
> They run.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that I missed last week! Real life is hectic right now. I'll be updating as regularly as possible. <3

The 46th Street Theatre is sturdy and safe around them, and it echoes with Pete's laughter as he drags Mikey by the hand down the stairs. Mikey stumbles after him, feeling like he's soaring despite his clumsy feet.  
They stop in front of the stage and flop down on the ground. "Oof," Pete grunts, giggling, and stretches out on his back beside Mikey. He laces their fingers together and squeezes.  
Mikey can't stop smiling. "Tell me what you're thinking," Pete would say normally, but now he doesn't say anything. Mikey speaks up anyway. He feels like something in his chest might burst if he doesn't.  
"I could die right now, Pete," he says, his voice trembling with meaning. He feels like this moment should be scary, but it's not. Pete buoys him up and fills his heart and lungs. He should make it hard to breathe, but instead it's easier than ever. "I'm just... happy. I've never felt like this before. I'm exactly where I want to be."  
Pete curls an arm over Mikey's waist and rests his head on Mikey's chest. His smile speaks more than words.  
Before Mikey can wrap an arm around him, Pete is being yanked back and dragged into the darkness. He reaches desperately for Mikey as he disappears, yelling his name helplessly.  
"No!" Mikey scrambles to his feet. "Pete!"  
It's too dark. He can't see. He stumbles over something and trips, falling to his knees.  
"I wanna call it off!" he screams, throwing his head back towards the ceiling. "Can anybody hear me?! I changed my mind, I don't want this anymore, I wanna call it off!"  
The silence that follows feels like it's suffocating him. He makes a frustrated noise and digs his hands into his hair.  
His head snaps up when he hears a weak voice behind him.  
"Mikey?"  
"Pete...?" Mikey starts crawling in the direction the voice is coming from. He gropes around in the dark until he finds Pete's hand.  
"We gotta go," he says urgently, pulling Pete to his feet. "Pete, come on, we gotta go."  
"Where?"  
"I dunno, but we gotta go."  
Holding hands tightly, they run up the stairs.

They're wrestling on Mikey's bed under a blanket, laughing.

"Concentrate!" Mikey says urgently.  
They run.

The theatre door leads to the hallway of Mikey's apartment building. Mikey doesn't stop to question it. He walks as fast as he can, dragging Pete by the hand behind him.  
They walk past sex in the shower, past Christmas last year at Frank and Gerard's, past coffee shops and waterparks. Mikey's heading straight for the door at the end of the hall. It's labelled _Dr Asher_.  
"Don't let the recorder intimidate you," she is saying to him inside. "Just tell me about Pete."  
"I changed my mind," he says from the doorway. Dr Asher and the memory of himself turn to look at him. "I don't want this anymore. You gotta stop it. Wake me up!"  
"Oh," says Dr Asher, sounding alarmed. "Well, I'm sorry, Mr Way, but I can't stop it from in here!"  
Mikey's heart sinks. "What do you mean?"  
"I'm in your head too, you know. And soon I'll be gone. How can I wake you up?"  
Mikey looks over his shoulder. Pete is gone.  
There's a clatter in the opposite doorway and a flash of brown hair. Mikey walks forward to get a closer look.  
It's a young man, or it was; his features are contorted horrifically and look like they're melting off his face. "Sorry," he says.  
"Who's that?" Mikey demands, whipping around to face Dr Asher again.  
She frowns. "Oh," she says. "That's Brendon. Brennnnnnny." Her voice slurs bizarrely; for a moment she sounds like Pete. "He works here."  
"He's stealing my identity." Mikey is breathing heavily. "He's using my words."  
"That sounds pretty messed up," says Dr Asher.

The floor of the theatre is dusty and uncomfortable. Brendon peers around in the darkness and wonders what Pete likes so much about this crummy old place anyway. Pete's just lying there quietly and has been for a while, so Brendon decides now is as good a time as any to speak up.  
"I could die right now, Pete," he says hurriedly, stumbling over his words a little. "I'm just happy. I've never felt like this before. I'm exactly where I want to be."  
Pete sits up abruptly. "I want to go home."  
Brendon blinks in surprise as Pete getss to his feet. "Wait, what?"  
He scrambles after Pete as he walks away up the stairs.

"Pete? Pete?!"  
Mikey looks around frantically. He can't see Pete anywhere. He's not in line for any of the nearby waterslides. He's not floating around in the pool with Mikey. He's not sitting beside the pool either. Maybe he wandered off. He does that a lot at Camelbeach. Normally Mikey wouldn't be worried, because Pete always finds his way back to Mikey. But they _seriously_ don't have time for this right now.  
"Boo!" Pete pops up from underwater beside Mikey with a huge splash. Mikey jumps.  
"Pete! Jesus Christ! We gotta focus," he hisses.  
"Why do we have to focus again?" Pete asks, seeming confused.  
"Because they're erasing you." Mikey runs a frustrated hand through his hair. "I hired them. I'm sorry, I'm so fucking stupid."  
Pete rolls his eyes and smiles. "Relax, Mikeyway. Enjoy the water."  
He goes to float away, but Mikey grabs his hand. "No," he says firmly, starting to pull them both towards the ladder. "We gotta do something. Before morning comes and I don't know you anymore." The thought feels like a punch in the gut.  
"Okay, well, tell them to call it off!" Pete says as they climb out of the pool. Mikey lets himself take a moment to drink Pete in before he answers, admiring his tattoos and tanned skin, glistening with water.  
"I can't," he eventually says. "I'm asleep."  
"Wake yourself up!" says Pete, like it's the most obvious thing in the world.  
Mikey groans in frustration. "I can't just wake myself up!"  
"That sounds like a signature Mikeyway self-fulfilling prophecy."  
"Fine!" Mikey snaps. "I'll wake myself up!" He reaches up to hold his eyelids open.  
Pete rolls his eyes. "Mikey-"

Mikey doesn't hear the rest of the sentence because suddenly he's back in his apartment.  
"It's a birthmark!" someone is squealing. Someone else is laughing.

He startles, and he's back in the waterpark. Pete is staring at him in confusion. "What? Are you okay?"  
"It worked," Mikey says in astonishment. "I mean, only for a second, and I couldn't move..."  
Pete groans. "Shit, okay. What are we gonna do?"  
"I don't know." Mikey palms at his eyes, suddenly angry. "This is your fault, anyway. You erased me!"  
"I'm sorry." Pete sounds more serious than Mikey's heard him be since he met. "I'm really sorry, Mikey. You know me, I'm-"  
"Impulsive," Mikey finishes for him. "Yeah."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos make my day!


	9. Improvisando

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The eraser guys are coming here, so why don't we just leave?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGH sorry for the delay... My personal life is a lot less hectic now and updates should be more regular.

"I have another idea," Pete declares, sitting up on the couch.  
Mikey hums questioningly, wrapping an arm around Pete's waist and pulling him back down against him. Pete relaxes and nuzzles his nose into Mikey's neck.  
"This is a memory of me, right?" he says. "The way you kept looking at my package because you wanted to have sex with me on the couch-"  
"What," Mikey protests, tearing his eyes away from the faint outline of Pete's cock through his boxers.  
Pete shoves him lightly and laughs. "Anyway. What if we went into a memory that's not of me? The eraser guys are coming here, so why don't we just leave?"  
"A memory that's not of you?"  
"Yeah. Somewhere they won't think to look."  
Mikey frowns. "Huh," he says. "I can't remember anything without you."  
Pete rolls his eyes. " _Dude_."  
"Okay, okay." Mikey takes a deep breath and closes his eyes.

" _Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way..._ "

"...Oh what fun it is to ride in a one-hourse open sleigh," Mikey sings under his breath, a smile spreading across his face.

Gerard is making snow angels on the front lawn. Mikey wanders over to join him, waddling slightly in his snowpants.

"Hey! Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way," Pete joins in, loud and off-key. Mikey laughs and pulls him tight against his chest as snow starts to drift down from the ceiling.  
"Its working," he says wonderingly. Pete sticks his tongue out and catches snowflakes.

" _Dashing through the snow on a one-horse open sleigh... Over the fields we go, laughing all the way..._ "

"Mikey?" Pete calls, squinting as the snowfall gets heavier in the now-empty apartment. "Mikey! I'm supposed to come with you!"

"Gerard, sweetie? Have you seen Mikey?"  
Mikey peers out from under the kitchen table at his mother, whose face splits into a relieved smile. "Oh! There you are. Nevermind, Gee. Mary, you wouldn't mind keeping an eye on him while I cook, would you?"  
"No, of course not," says Mary, and Mikey has to hold in a loud snort, because that isn't the voice of Mary Fitzpatrick from down the road. That's _Pete_.  
His mother leaves the room and Mikey peers out from under the table again to see Pete in a knee-length pink dress and white boots. "Mikey! It worked!" he says excitedly. "And check out these awesome clothes!" He takes a moment to admire his outfit before giggling. "My dick is still here, though, look," he says, and lifts his skirt to show Mikey his black boxers.  
Mikey crinkles his nose up. "Ew."  
Pete giggles again and drops his dress. "Don't be a baby."  
"I'm only four," Mikey declares, holding up four fingers to illustrate his point.  
"And who am I?"  
"Mrs. Fitzpatrick from down the road."  
Mikey's mom reenters the room. "I found the salad bowl. Listen, would you hate me if I asked you to clean some beans? I need to go check on Gerard."  
"No problem."  
Mikey crawls out from under the table, but his mom is already leaving the room. He crosses his arms and pouts.  
"She's not looking at me," he whimpers. "She's busy. She's not looking at me. _I want my mommy!_ " He stomps his foot and throws himself down onto his stomach.  
"Oh no," says Pete, obviously surpressing laughter. Mikey crawls back under the table.  
"Mary, do you want a drink?" Mikey's mom calls from the other room.  
"Sure! Thank you!"  
While Pete is distracted and his mom is busy, Mikey goes over to the fridge and reaches for the freezer handle. He thinks that maybe they have strawberry ice cream. He remembers eating some.  
"Mikey, what are you doing?" Pete sounds like he's trying very hard to take this situation seriously.  
"S'cream," Mikey replies, still straining to reach the handle.  
"Not until you've, uh... had your dinner."  
Mikey whines and goes back under the table in a huff. Being four sucks.  
"Mikey, grow up!" Pete is beginning to sound frustrated. Mikey starts to cry.  
"I'm scared!" he sobs, spreading out on the floor. "I want my mommy!"  
"Mikey!" Pete drops to his knees beside the table. "Snap out of it!"  
"I want my mommy!" Mikey repeats tearfully.  
"This is sorta warped," says Pete.

William is awoken by a loud beeping noise. He blinks blearily before yelping and scrambling out of the armchair where he and Gabe were tangled up.  
"What? What's going on?" Gabe asks sleepily as William pulls his boxers back on.  
William chews his lip nervously, clicking buttons on his machine. "He's gone off the map," he mumbles. " _Shit_."  
"Fuck," Gabe hisses, getting up as well. "What do we do?"  
"I don't know!" William says, a little frantically. "This has never happened before! Fuck. We gotta call Victoria."  
"We can't call Victoria!" Gabe yelps.  
"Do you have a better suggestion?" William presses a few more buttons and groans in frustration. " _Fuck_. I don't know what to do, I'm in so much trouble."  
"I don't want Victoria to see me like this!" Gabe is scrambling back into his clothes. "I am so stoned."  
William rolls his eyes, already pulling his phone out.

Victoria is just climbing into bed when her phone starts ringing. Her boyfriend, Adam, looks at her with raised eyebrows as she sighs and answers it.  
"William, it's 2 am."  
"I know, I'm sorry. But we've run into a problem."  
"What sort of problem?"  
"Well, see... he's gone off the map."  
Victoria holds in a groan. "God, okay. I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Gabe? She's coming right now."  
"I'm staying."  
"No, I think you should go."  
"I'm staying!" Gabe insists.  
"You have no idea how much trouble we could get in-"  
"William, shut up. I'm staying."  
William shuts up.

Mikey gasps for air in between sobs, rocking back and forth under the table. Pete lets out an exasperated sigh, pacing around the kitchen, before finally giving up and crawling under the table as well.  
"Mikey. Mikey! Cut it out! Listen to me!"  
He waits until Mikey's sobs have died down to sniffles before continuing. "Okay. You're gonna remember me, and in the morning you gotta come find me. And you can tell me about us, and we'll start over. Okay?"  
"How am I gonna remember you in the morning?" Mikey asks tearfully.  
"We'll hide out here! As Baby Mikey and Mrs Fitzpatrick!"  
"But what about that Brendon guy?"  
"Huh?"  
"That Brendon guy... he's copying me!"  
Pete frowns in confusion. "What Brendon guy?"  
"He's one of those eraser guys. He, like, fell for you, and then went into The Academy and pretended he didn't know you. And now you're dating."  
"Really?" Pete smirks. "Is he cute?"

Pete can hardly breathe. He grips the steering wheel tightly and tries to get ahold of himself, ignoring the concerned looks Brendon is giving him from the passenger seat.  
"Pete, there's nothing wrong with you!" Brendon insists. "You're perfect! You're... you're funny, and smart, and attractive, and... nice..."  
Pete's eyes go wide and he turns sharply to look at Brendon. "What?!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are much appreciated!!


	10. Rondo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hide me somewhere deeper!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh my GOD i can't believe this is late AGAIN i'm sooo sorry holy shit

"I'm so stoned," Gabe groans as he squints into the mirror above the Way guy's sink, trying to fix his hair. "Those eyedrops you gave me didn't do shit."  
The doorbell goes and Gabe scrambles to answer it. William stands there awkwardly as Victoria steps into the room, eyebrows raised and staring at Gabe.  
"Hi, Gabe. What are you doing here?"  
"Hi, Victoria. He's, uh, just here to help out," William says, wondering why he suddenly feels like a third wheel.  
"I just wanted to understand as much as I could about the procedure," Gabe pipes up eagerly as Victoria shrugs off her coat. "I think it's important for... for my job. To understand as much as possible about what we do. Well, not that I do. The work my colleagues do. Yeah."  
"Alright," Victoria says with a shrug. "So, let's see what's going on here."  
She sits down in front of the computer and immediately frowns. "Well, this is very odd. William, you've tried everything?"  
"Uh huh. Everything I know how to do."  
"What was happening right before he went off?"  
William tries not to panic. "I was, uh, away from the moniter for a second... I had to pee..."  
Victoria frowns. "Where was Brendon? Where _is_ Brendon, as a matter of fact?"  
"He had to go home sick."  
Victoria sighs heavily. "Okay. I'm gonna go through the entire memory and see if something comes up."

_"This won't do. What's the matter with you? All it takes is faith and trust... oh!And something I forgot. Dust!"_  
Mikey cuddles happily against Pete's side. "I always loved this movie."  
"I've never seen you so happy, Baby Mikey," Pete laughs.  
 _"Come on, everybody, here we go! Off to Neverland!"_

"I found something," Victoria says in relief, quickly pressing buttons. "I have no idea how he got off like that, though..."

Mikey starts as the movie disappears from the screen, replaced with static. The next second, Pete disappears from underneath him. Mikey yelps and tumbles off the couch.

On the bed, the Way guy jerks and his eyes fly open.  
"Oh, shit," says Victoria with a sigh. "That's not good. Has this happened with him before?"  
"No." William tries to sound as sure about that as possible.  
"Well, I'm gonna need to give him an injection, keep him sedated. He seems to be developing a resisitance to the treatment."  
Gabe and William watch anxiously as she administers the dose of sedative. The Way guy's eyelids flutter before sliding closed.  
"Okay," says Victoria in relief. "Back to work."  
None of them notice the tear slowly making its way down Mikey's cheek.

Pete and Mikey are sitting on Pete's floor playing Jenga. Pete pulls a block out of the bottom of the tower, letting out a triumphant yell; Mikey cringes, expecting the loud clatter of the blocks hitting the floor, but it doesn't come. The blocks disappear before they can fall.  
"Pete!" Mikey yelps, scrambling to his feet. "We gotta go!"  
"Where?" Pete whines, pouting up at Mikey. "I'm having fun here. With you."  
"Just come on!" He pulls Pete to his feet and runs to the door as the furniture vanishes around them.  
The door of Pete's apartment leads to the hallway over Falta Inc. They hurry down to the end, to Dr Asher's door.  
"Dr Asher!" Mikey yells, flinging the door open. "Please-"  
Dr Asher's face is gone. She sits at her desk, blank and silent. Mikey curses, turning on his heel.  
"Hide me somewhere deeper!" Pete suggests, grabbing Mikey's hand. "Under something you don't think about!"  
"Like... under something embarrassing?"  
"Yeah, I guess. Humiliation or something."  
Mikey squeezes his eyes shut. "Humiliation," he mutters. "Humiliation. Humiliation..."

"Humiliation... humiliation..."  
"Mikey!" Pete sounds torn between shock and amusement.  
"I know," Mikey groans, tightening his hand around his dick under the duvet. "I don't like it either."  
Pete averts his eyes, holding back laughter. "Jesus," he says. "Okay. How is this embarrass-"  
Before he can even finish his sentence, there's a knock on the dooor. Mikey freezes as the door swings open to reveal Mrs Way.  
"Mikey, darling? I was wondering-"  
She cuts off and her face goes a bright shade of red as she realizes what's going on, and she quickly backs out of the room. "You know what, I'll ask you later."  
Pete can't help but burst out laughing as Mikey rolls over and buries his face into his pillow.

Victoria is pulling her coat on when the alarm goes off again. All three of them groan simultaneously, and Victoria shrugs her coat back off.  
"I feel like we're in for a long night," she says.

Pete tries to stop laughing and rubs Mikey's back comfortingly. "It's okay, Mikey! I'm sure it happens to lots of kids- hey!" He sounds shocked suddenly. "Hey, Mikey, look where we are!"  
Mikey pulls his head out of the pillow and looks around.  
"Oh no," he says.  
His bed is sitting on the sidewalk outside of The Knitting Factor; there's loud music coming from inside.  
"This is bad," he says. "This is really bad."  
"You gotta hide me somewhere deeper!" Pete says as they hurry away. "Somewhere super buried!"  
"Okay, okay. Super buried."

He and Gerard are walking home from school, both of them clutching at their backpack straps. They duck into an alleyway, the way they always do on their way home. It's a shortcut, and it lets them avoid one of the busier intersections near their house.  
Pete is walking just behind them - Mikey had seen him last time he glanced over his shoulder. His hair is brown and curls tightly against his head, and he has black high tops just like Mikey's.  
Mikey doesn't pay much attention to him, because Gerard is talking about Batman and it's super amazing. Mikey stares up at him in awe, and wishes he could be like his big brother.  
Both of them are too caught up in the intricacies of Batman to notice the three boys waiting for them about halfway down the alley until it's too late. They're older than Mikey, maybe around Gerard's age - no older than sixth graders. Mikey looks on helplessly as they grab Gerard, and pin him against the wall.  
"Don't hurt him!" he says tearfully, which makes the boys laugh. One of them grabs Mikey by the shirt and drags him over to Gerard.  
"Either we hit him, or you do," the boy declares, grinning.  
"No, I can't," Mikey whimpers. "I can't, don't make me."  
"It's okay, Mikey," Gerard says, obviously trying to sound reassuring. "You can hit me."  
"Yeah, hit him! Hit him!"  
The boys are yelling, and Gerard keeps saying "It's okay, Mikey, it's okay", and Mikey is crying, and finally he can't take it anymore. He steps forward, his face crumpled up, and whacks his fist against Gerard's stomach. He does it again, and again, until the boys go quiet and Gerard looks like he's on the verge of tears.  
"Come on, Mikey," says Pete from behind them. He pushes past the three boys and takes Mikey's hand. "Let's go. Come on, Gerard."  
He pulls both of them out of the alleyway by their hands, and doesn't let go until he's at their house. Gerard runs inside, and Mikey and Pete sit down on the stoop.  
"I'm so ashamed," Mikey sighs, putting his chin in his hands.  
Pete wraps an arm securely around his shoulders. "You were a little kid. It's not your fault."  
"I guess. I wish I knew you when I was a kid."  
"Yeah? You like my hair?" Pete laughs. He pulls away and lifts his arms up above his head. "Here, feel better. You can tickle me this time."  
Mikey brightens. "Yeah?"  
"Yeah. Go on."  
Mikey dives in and Pete squeals, tumbling off the stoop onto the lawn. Mikey kneels next to him, his fingers attacking Pete's neck and stomach, giggling as Pete squirms and flails.

"Pete! Stop it!" Mikey gasps out through laughter. "Cut it out!"  
"Nuh-uh. This is what you get for calling me short, fucker." Pete tightens his legs on either side of Mikey's waist to keep him from squirming away. His fingers dance over Mikey's neck and Mikey makes an embarrassing squealing noise.  
"I'm sorry!" he chokes. "Have mercy!"  
Pete disappears from on top of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments and kudos are appreciated!!


	11. Diminuendo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "This is beautiful to watch," Gabe says quietly, a dreamy look on his face. "Like a... a brain surgeon, or a composer or something."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> good news!! i have several chapters typed up ahead of times, so updates should be regular from now on!  
> enjoy!

"I think I've got the hang of this," Victoria says, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I don't understand it, but I'm finding him quietly."  
"This is beautiful to watch," Gabe says quietly, a dreamy look on his face. "Like a... a brain surgeon, or a composer or something."  
Victoria chews her lip. "Thank you, Gabe," she says, and William looks down at the ground.

The Knitting Factory is dark and packed full of people. Mikey doesn't know who the band on the stage are, but they're loud and energetic. Pete is next to him, jumping along with the crowd; if Mikey knows Pete, which he does, then he'll be in the pit any second.  
They seriously don't have time for this. Mikey grabs Pete by the elbow and starts to drag him through the crowd towards the exit.  
Pete tries to pull him back. "I wanna mosh!" he yells over the music.  
"Pete, come on, we gotta go-"  
"No, I wanna mosh-"  
Mikey drags Pete towards the door, Pete fighting back against him. By the time they get there, they're out of time. Pete vanishes.

"I like watching you work, Victoria," Gabe says eagerly.  
William holds in a sigh. "If you guys don't mind, I'm gonna get going. It seems like you've got this under control, Victoria."  
"Yeah, sure," Victoria nods. "See you tomorrow, Bill."  
"Bye," says Gabe with a smile. William smiles weakly back at him as he walks out the door.

They're standing on a crowded sidewalk behind a barricade, watching a parade. There are floats and marching bands and women in sequins atop huge grey elephants. One of the elephants trumpets as it marches past, and Pete laughs as Mikey trumpets back.  
"I wanna be an elephant!" he says. "A big, giant, humongous elephant!"  
Mikey laughs and wraps his arms around Pete. He stumbles forward and almost falls when Pete disappears.

Gabe is sitting cross-legged in the big armchair, watching Victoria's perfectly-manicured fingers clacking away at the keyboard. He bites his lip nervously before getting up and going to sit closer.  
"I really admire the work you do, Victoria," he says earnestly. She pauses and looks up at him; he hopes to god he's not blushing. "I'm sorry for being so, uh, familiar... I just..."  
"No, it's oka-"  
She's cut off when Gabe leans over and kisses her.  
He pulls away almost instantly and puts a hand over his mouth.  
"Shit. Oh my god, I'm so sorry..."  
She stares at him and he gets up and goes back to the armchair, his hand still over his mouth.  
"I just really like you," he mumbles.  
"Gabe," Victoria says, trying to be as gentle as possible. "You're a really great guy, but I... I have a boyfriend, you know I have a boyfriend."  
"I know... I'm sorry..."  
She gets up and walks over, pulling him up to his feet.  
"We can't do this," she breathes. "Gabe..."  
She pulls him into a kiss.

Outside on the sidewalk, William sighs heavily, staring up at Way's window, through which he can clearly see Gabe and Victoria. Scuffing his foot on the ground dejectly, he starts walking towards the van.  
He halts in his tracks when a car comes along that he's sure he recognizes. It clicks into place when Victoria's boyfriend, Adam, climbs out.  
"Hi, William," he says, his voice tight.  
"Oh. Hey, Adam. What are you..."  
He trails off as he follows Adam's gaze up to Way's window, where Victoria and Gabe are still going at it rather enthusiastically.  
Adam laughs humourlessly and reaches into his car to press down on the horn. Gabe and Victoria break apart; her mouth drops open and she disappears from the window.  
She comes running out the door less than a minute later. William averts his eyes as she approaches Adam.  
"I'm sorry," she says breathlessly. "Adam, I'm so sorry. It was a mistake, it won't happen again-"  
Adam gives her a brittle smile, climbing back into his car. "I knew it, Vicky. I fucking knew it."  
"No, it's not like that! I came here to work, I swear-"  
Gabe comes running out of the building and screeches to a stop next to her. "It's not her fault! It was me! I just, I have a stupid crush, I practically forced her into it-'  
Adam raises his eyebrows. "Don't be a monster, Vicky, tell the poor guy."  
Gabe blinks. "Tell me what?" he asks in confusion.  
Victoria looks down at the ground guiltily.  
With a sigh, Adam puts the car in gear. "You can have her," he says. "You did."  
He drives off, leaving Gabe staring at Victoria. "What does he mean...?"  
She looks up, but doesn't look him in the eye. "You... you wanted it done," she says helplessly. "The procedure. You thought it would help you get past... well... me."  
Gabe takes a step backward, his eyes wide. She reaches out a hand to him, but he shakes his head and she drops it.  
"I'm sorry," she says softly, and turns back towards the building. "We'll talk tomorrow, okay?"  
He stares down at the ground as she goes back inside. William takes a deep breath and walks over to him.  
"Let me drive you home."  
Gabe shakes his head. He glances up at William and smiles weakly before haltingly walking away down the road. William sighs heavily and goes back inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please review & leave kudos if you enjoyed!
> 
> 20/02/15: minor edits made to chapter 8


	12. Leitmotif

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Remember me in the morning."

Mikey pushes open the door of The Academy, cringing when the bell jingles. There's no turning back now, because Pete, sitting at the counter with a book, has looked over and seen him. He arches an eyebrow. Mikey smiles nervously and walks over.  
"Hey," he says.  
"I'm surprised you're showing your face," Pete replies bluntly. "You fucked off pretty fast the other day. I thought you weren't interested."  
Mikey runs his hand through his hair. "Yeah. Uh. Actually, I was wondering if you wanted to, like, get a coffee or something..."  
He hopes he doesn't sound as stupid as he feels.  
Pete groans and puts his book down on the counter.  
"Listen," he says. "Too many guys think I'm a concept. They think I'm gonna fix them, or make them feel alive or something. But I'm just a fucked up dude looking for my own peace of mind."  
Mikey smiles softly. "I remember that speech really well," he says.  
Pete's shoulders relax and he laughs. "I had you pegged, didn't I?"  
"I think you had the whole world pegged."  
"Mmh, probably." Pete tilts his head and smiles at Mikey sadly, and Mikey swallows past the lump in his throat.  
"Even after that, I still thought you were gonna save me," he admits.  
"It's okay," says Pete. "I think I thought you were gonna save me too."  
"It would be different if we could just give it another go." Mikey is clinging desperately to this notion like it matters at all, like they're not running out of time and fading fast. He can't help but feel like if he could just convince Pete, it would somehow save them, pull them up from beneath the surface and keep them afloat together.  
"Remember me in the morning." Pete leans over the counter and cups Mikey's face in his hands. "Maybe we can."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed! :*


	13. Reprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Oh god. I can't do this."

Gabe takes absolutely no care while searching for his file. He throws folders off the shelf onto the ground, he sweeps things off the desks, and he dumps out boxes of CDs.  
Finally, he finds it in the top drawer of Victoria's desk.  
With shaking hands, he takes out the CD and pops it into the player on the desk.  
" _Okay,_ " says Victoria's voice. " _Just tell me everything you remember_."  
" _Alright_." That's his voice. " _Um. Well... I liked you immediately. I thought you were so beautiful... I was kind of intimidated at first, because I knew how smart you are, but you were so nice to me and I-_ " He hears his voice break and feels like he might throw up. " _Oh god. I can't do this._ "  
" _Gabe, we agreed it's for the best._ "  
" _I know, I... Just give me a minute..._ "  
He squeezes his eyes shut and puts his head in his hands.


	14. Da Capo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the first time we met.

"This is gonna be awesome," Frank says excitedly, swinging his and Gerard's hands between them as the three of them walk down the sidewalk to The Knitting Factory. There are a bunch of people, mostly in black and with various tattoos and piercings, milling around outside. Frank and Gerard fit right in.  
Mikey ends up in a mosh pit about halfway through the band's set, slamming into people with reckless abandon. He's taken an elbow to the gut and is beginning to consider getting out when he crashes into someone and sends them flying to the floor.  
"Sorry," he mouths to the guy, holding out a hand to help him up. The guy, who's short and covered in tattoos, grins widely and takes it. He gives Mikey a quick nod once he's on his feet and dives right back into the pit. Mikey stares after him.  
_This is the first time we met, _he thinks.  
After the show, he's leaning against the wall outside, waiting for Frank and Gerard when someone clears their throat beside him. He turns to see the guy he'd knocked over in the pit.  
"Hi," says the guy. "Thanks for helping me up."  
Mikey smiles and shrugs. "Common courtesy."  
"Yeah, but not everyone does it. So thanks." He grins and adds, "I'm Pete. Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz III. No jokes about my name."  
Mikey smirks. "What, like 'that's a big name for such a little guy'?"  
Pete groans. "Yeah. Like that."  
"Sorry." Mikey tries to surpress a grin. "I'm Mikey."  
"It's nice to meet you, Mikey."  
They shake hands.  
"This is it," Pete says quietly. "It's all gonna be gone soon."  
"I know." Mikey traces his thumb over Pete's cheekbone, trying to drink him in, cling onto every precious detail.  
"What are we gonna do?"  
Mikey shrugs and manages a small smile. "Enjoy it."__


	15. Melisma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Done. It's done."

"Do you wanna go somewhere cool?" Pete asks.  
Mikey looks around. He's supposed to get a lift home with Frank and Gerard, but they're nowhere in sight and he figures they've either left without him or they're fucking in the washroom again. "Sure," he says.  
Pete hails a cab and tells the cabbie to drop them at the Williamsburg bridge. Mikey frowns in confusion. The Williamsburg bridge isn't exactly "somewhere cool".  
"C'mon," Pete says after he's paid the cab driver. He leads Mikey away from the bridge, and Mikey follows him nervously.  
He realizes where they're going when he sees the big yellow DOMINO sign. The abandoned sugar refinery. He stops in his tracks.  
"Dude. You're not allowed inside that place."  
"Shut up," Pete replies. He grabs Mikey's hand and drags him down the street until they stop outside the fence.  
Mikey gapes as Pete grabs onto the fence and starts to climb. " _Dude_! Are you fucking serious?"  
"Yes. This place is fucking awesome. Come on!"  
"Aren't there asbestos or something?"  
"Come on," Pete repeats impatiently.  
Mikey takes a step back. he can't do this. He feels stupid and inadequate. "I should go."  
Pete drops down onto the other side of the fence. "So go."  
Mikey hesitates before turning around and beginning to walk away.  
"I wish you'd stayed," says Pete.  
Mikey looks back and gives him a sad smile. The refinery is crumbling into the darkness. They're almost out of time.  
"I wish I'd stayed too," he says. "Now I wish I'd stayed. I wish I'd done a lot of things. I wish..." He swallows, hard. "I wish I'd stayed."  
"Why did you leave, anyway?"  
Mikey laughs humourlessly. "You said 'so go'," he says. "With such scorn, y'know? I guess I was... I dunno. I felt like a scared little kid. I don't know. But I wish I hadn't."  
He starts to walk away again. This time, he's almost to the main road when his name is called.  
"What if you stay this time?"  
"This is it," Mikey calls back. "There's no memory left."  
"At least come back and make up a goodbye. It's about time we had one."  
Mikey runs back to the factory and climbs the fence without a second thought. As soon as he's over it, Pete steps forward and wraps his arms around him.  
"Bye," he whispers.  
"I love you," Mikey says desperately, his voice breaking. He needs Pete to know. He needs him to understand.  
Pete leans up to Mikey's ear as he starts to fade away. "Meet me here," he breathes. "Meet me in Brooklyn."

Victoria presses one last button and lets out an exhausted sigh. "Done," she says. "It's done."  
William gets up and carefully removes the helmet from the Way guy's head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg... i can't believe i'm almost done uploading this... this fic has been a part of my life for so long and i have no idea how i'm going to feel 2 weeks from now...


	16. Encore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Mikey wakes up, his head kind of hurts and there's a crick in his neck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg, i JUST noticed that i uploaded the same chapter twice by accident!! sorry!! here's the right chapter!!

When Mikey wakes up, his head kind of hurts and there's a crick in his neck. He groans at the light coming in through the window and pulls himself to his feet, and immediately wants to go back to bed.  
He takes his meds and decides it's one of Those Days.  
He calls in sick to work.  
He makes it to about midday before he decides he's going stir-crazy and has to get out of the house. That's kind of weird. Mikey normally doesn't go stir-crazy. He's normally perfectly fine with sitting at home in front of his TV. It's one of Those Days, he reminds himself, and gets on the L train.

When William gets to work the next morning, he runs into Gabe, who is struggling out the door with a box in his hands. His mind goes blank for a minute as Gabe walks to his car and puts the box in the trunk, which is already full of other boxes.  
He comes to his senses when Gabe slams the trunk closed, and he hurries forward. "Gabe!"  
Gabe gives him a sad smile. "Hey, Bilvy."  
"You're leaving?" William asks, even though he already knows the answer.  
"Yeah. Yeah, I can't..." Gabe trails off, and looks at William suspiciously. "You promise you didn't know?"  
William shakes his head. "No. I swear."  
"Okay." Gabe lets out a shaky breath. "Well... bye, I guess."  
"I really like you, Gabe," William blurts out as Gabe turns away. "Like, a lot."  
Gabe laughs quietly. "I really like you too," he says. "And I'll see you soon. There's just something I gotta take of first."

Pete has a huge smile on his face when he walks into his apartment. He presses play on his answering machine as he walks past and listens absently to the new message while he digs a change of clothes out of his closet.  
" _Pete? It's Brendon. I don't know what I did wrong... can you please call me and we'll talk about it?_ "  
Pete rolls his eyes and deletes the message on his way out the door.  
He grabs his mail from the mailbox when he walks past it. There's a shitload of junk mail, a couple of bills, and a package, which he frowns at in confusion. He hasn't ordered anything recently and hasn't been expecting a package. On top of that, he has no idea what "Falta, Inc." is.  
"So did you have a good night?" he asks when he gets back into Mikey's car.   
Mikey nods, smiling. "Yeah, totally. I had a really nice time."  
Pete prods his arm. " _Nice_? Come on, you can do better than that!"  
"Fine." Mikey laughs, sounding a bit giddy. "I had the best fucking night of my fucking life."  
"Better," says Pete approvingly. He rips open the package and pulls out a letter. As he reads it, his eyebrows crinkle together in confusion.  
"What?" Mikey asks, glancing over. "What is it?"  
" _To all patients of Dr Victoria Asher. My name is Gabe Saporta. We've met, but you don't remember me. I worked for a company that was hired to erase some of your memories. I've since realized that this was a horrible mistake on the part of Falta, Inc., and to correct the situation I am sending everyone's file back to them_ ," Pete reads aloud.  
"What the fuck?" Mikey says as Pete pulls a CD out of the package. "Put it on!"  
Pete pops it into the drive and presses play.  
" _My name is Pete Wentz_ ," comes Pete's voice from the speakers, " _and I'm here to erase Mikey Way._ "  
Mikey looks sharply at Pete. "What the fuck?!"  
Pete's eyes are wide. "I... I don't know..."  
" _He's boring. Is that enough reason to erase someone?_ " Pete on the tape laughs bitterly. " _And he doesn't fucking express any emotions. He does this blank expression, like there's no joy or passion or feelings in him. It drives me crazy_."  
"Are you screwing with me?" Mikey asks angrily.  
"No, I swear-"  
"You're fucking screwing with me!"  
"I'm not, I-"  
Mikey ejects the CD and practically throws it at Pete before reaching across him and opening the door. "Get out."  
Pete sits there for a moment, frozen in shock, then grabs his stuff and gets out of the car.

He walks back home, disoriented and angry and confused. None of this is helped by seeing Brendon standing at his front door.  
"Pete," says Brendon as he approaches, "can we please-"  
"Fuck off!" Pete yells, pushing past him.  
"But can't we please just talk about it?"  
"No! Fuck off!"  
He goes upstairs and cries on his bed.

When he gets ahold of himself, he finishes listening to the tape. When he recovers from that, he drives over to Mikey's apartment. He knocks tentatively on the door and pushes it open. "Mikey...?"  
Mikey's sitting on the couch, staring into space, CD playing in the background.  
" _He's impulsive. And he just expects everyone to drop everything and do along with his shit._  
"Oh. Hey," Mikey says with a start when he notices Pete standing there. "Sorry. Let me, uh, turn this off."  
"It's fine," Pete mumbles, shaking his head. "You heard mine, it's only fair."  
"Sorry for yelling at you," Mikey sighs. "Apparently you're not screwing with me."  
Pete laughs weakly. "Yeah. It would seem that way."  
" _He gets people to like him by fucking them. Or at least dangling the possibility of getting fucked in front of them._ "  
"I don't do that," Pete says, chewing his lip. "And it hurts that you said that about me because that's not something I do."  
"That's not something I would think about you," Mikey says earnestly. "I don't know why I said that."  
Pete sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. "I shouldn't have come here. I'm sorry," he says. "I... I'm confused. I should go."  
"Yeah... okay," Mikey mumbles.


	17. Coda

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holy shit i cant believe it  
> this is the final chapter  
> this fic has been such a big part of my life and i hope you all enjoyed reading it  
> kudos and comments are amazing and it makes my day when you leave them  
> thank you all xo

Pete's halfway down the hall when Mikey goes after him.  
"Wait!" he calls, jogging to catch up.  
Pete sighs and turns around. "What do you want?"  
"I don't know," Mikey pants, stopping in front of him. "I don't know what I want. But, please. Just wait a while. Just stay."  
Pete reaches up and wipes his eyes with his sleeve. "Listen, Mikey. I'm not a concept. Guys think that I'm gonna change their life. But I'm not. I'm just a fucked up dude looking for my own peace of mind."  
"I can't see anything I don't like about you," Mikey says almost pleadingly. He can't let Pete just walk out of his life like this. He can't fuck this up again.  
"But you will!" Pete exclaims. "And I'll get scared and try to push you away because that's what I do!"  
Mikey laughs shakily. "Okay," he says.  
Pete stares at him, and after a moment he laughs as well. "Okay," he says tremulously, wiping his eyes again. "Okay."  
And they both smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now press repeat.


End file.
